Christmas Eve was very tranquil – mild yellow sunshine in the early morning curled up on the chair next to the long long windows with the first cup of tea – promise of turning into hot sunshine later . the children clamouring for rides at the mela and trudging thereto . Hot hot hot – sit carefully on the swing boat so that it doesn’t interfere with the mad rush of air as the boat swings to giddying heights – up and down – a peculiar feeling of lightness as you curl up your feet under the seat all the better to experience the giddiness – the boat is made of wood and metal and what if a sudden flash of electricity swings through the apparatus knocking us all out for one massive six …… little bunny doing the mickey mouse climb and then bump with a dogged persistence over and over , her little face set and grim with the strain of her endeavour ..

The bunny's grandmother playing Christmas carols for the best part of Christmas eve and the next day … no invasive sounds of traffic or television , just the stars and a massive slice of black sky sprinkled with glittering stars and carols from a distance … Hosannah .. peace be unto all .. joy to the world and silent night ... rising , fading and dying in the dark cold night air , throbbing with the alien songs ..maybe it's my convent school childhood but I relate remarkably well to Christmas and the associated trappings and there is something infinitely moving about the musical arrangement of most carols ..

We saw in the New Year over the weekend .. a get together with friends on Saturday .. Absolut Citron for the ladies and good old Old Monk for the men with takeaways from Azad Hind Dhaba .. I like this lot of friends very much although we see each other infrequently , but I am very very fond of S and her husband and their cosy beautiful home . I love S ‘s serenity because that is a quality I lack , I love her utter simplicity and honesty and wish I had both .

We see in the new year with more friends , Vodka , whisky and as an afterthought , chicken marinated in yogurt and a mish mash of spices – I prefer my barbecue marinade plain – onion, garlic and oil and then barbecued and pulao and mutton . Too rich – I go for the barbecued chicken and the vodka – dessert is a chocolate layered cake from Nahoum’s . Why Nahoum’s I cannot fathom because the cake at Nahoum is always brittle and dry . Their forte is the light honey plum cake , sponge cake and the small cheesecakes apart from the cookies which are to die for … but chocolate cake ? Yuck . We dance and listen to much music although someone is insistent that Shakira's Hips dont lie keeps on being played ..not my cup of tea but I am happy with my drink..

I like to think I grew up a great deal in the course of the year by gathering a great deal of experience which I would be happier without . There were revelations of the worst kind that I never thought I would have to hear , there was heartbreak and there was a steeling of the self against so many betrayals that were painful to watch and be a part of but I would like to think that this has been a process of evolution of the self and somewhere through all this we have developed a resilience which has helped us to rationalise and cope with failures and helped us to emerge stronger and a little better than we were .